Sunday, 27 February 2011

A Close Shave, Or Am I A Cut Above The Rest?

Monday 21st Feb, Woke at 10am, I know I dreamt, but I can no longer recall it. I got up & looked out the window & I was met by a grey, cold, miserable day. So I wore my khaki Elle leggings, my peach scooped neck, curved hemmed, Velour, Petit Bateau top, worn over my beige H&M vest top, plus my chocolate Ugg boots & put on my book locket, that I'd won in a competition last Monday. I had a wash brushed my teeth & hair, then did a natural make-up. 

I popped to the kitchen & fixed myself a bowl of sugar free Alpen, with a sliced banana in it & a coffee. I took a diet pill with. I have just 6 pills left, so I have decided to have 3 pills a day, for the next 2 days in a row, to see if it makes them any more effective? As so far I have GAINED 2 3/4lb & then LOST 1/2lb on them, meaning in total, I have Gained 2 1/4lb on them, Not a good result for DIET PILLS!! I watched 'Loose Women' then pulled on Ivory puffa jacket & headed out to the park for a 2hr walk.  

My neck is so painful today, that I feel like weeping, I can't wait until tomorrow, for another acupuncture session!! On my way back from the park, I passed Jennie & Edgar's & Edgar stuck out his head & invited me in for a coffee, which I did & had a brief chat with him & Jennie before heading home at 3pm

I got in & made some Macaroni cheese for lunch. I then set off to the job centre, to check what jobs were available. Then I went out in the rain to the Post Office, in my Polar Bear/Panda woolly hat, to send the Annabelle's, peroxide wig back, that they had been sweet enough to send me, but its just not me! Also Sent off a big envelope of funny magazine story's ripped out of Now & Closer Magazine, to send to my fave Aunt as her Cancer is back (which I'm really upset about, it is such an evil illness & I have lost the majority of my relatives to it!!) 

Mum use to do the same when she was alive & I thought they would cheer her up, plus my a card for my nephews 1st Birthday, on Feb 25th can't believe a year has zoomed by since Alex was born. I bought the Card back in November in Joy (Couldn't resist as its so cute!!) It is a photo of a grey (real) cat lying on its back in a baby grow, with a dummy in its mouth & a small rattle in its curled paw (I bet my brother Bill's wife Karen Loves it!!) Shame Joy has closed down now (like most shops in St Albans, there are more empty shops than actual shops these days!) I loved that shop they had really funny or outrageous cards, I use to buy in bulk when ever I had a bit of cash to spare) in advance for when birthdays came up. I was even interviewed for the manager job when Joy 1st opened, wonder if it would of still closed if I'd got it? Mind you the rent & rates for shops, in St Albans are obcene for a rural area!!

Then I went into Santander, to sort out my Internet banking account, as I haven't been able to get into & manage my account since June last year. That's when Santander took over the Alliance & Leicester accounts, which has been infuriating, as I have had no way of knowing what was going in, or what was going out of my account, direct debit wise etc (like the time bloody TalkTalk took out £80 from my account, that they had no right to take & which made me unknowingly overdrawn, & in doing so cost me over £75 in bank charges!! ) Grrrrrrrr!!

The counter staff were lovely & did their best to solve the situation & a guy called Jay did his best to help & got on to the Internet section, on the phone. The Irish guy on the phone, said he has linked my Alliance & Leicester accounts, to the Santander online banking & gave me a ID code & said that a pin number would be in the post, saying they would send me a statement, going back to June 2010, when I could last log in. So I could then see what's gone on, in my account, as it's a non statement account. Jay then gave me his phone number & asked for mine, to take me for a drink (he obviously goes for bedraggled polar bears!!) He was sweet & polite, plus very helpful re my account, so I thought "What the hell why not!!"

Got in, did some hoovering & the washing up, then watched 'Come Dine With Me' & 'Coach Trip' then I got a text at 5.30pm it was from Jay, from the bank, saying "I need your hat now as its raining lol, nice helping you 2day x" I replied "It was raining all day hence the hat & the soggy hair" he replied Lol Hmmmm let you off, still wanted to see that soggy hair tho lol x" I replied "nobody sees the soggy hat hair, hair but me lol!!" 

Watched 'Home & Away' I missed Friday, followed by the next episode on FIVER. Then it was The Soaps 'Corrie & EastEnders'. But before they started, I got a call from a withheld number. I answered it & it was a guy. It turned out it was an ex footballer, turned actor, that I'd chatted to on a train to London, about 6 months or more ago. He said he'd been abroad working & did I fancy meeting up for a meal or drink in a couple of weeks in st Albans? I said yes why not. 

Before & After

I watched 'The Biggest Loser' it's the 7th week next week is the final, & it will be interesting to see the results, when those of those who got sent home, to diet & exercises alone, all come back!! I was peckish, but not hugely hungry, so for tea I had sugar free Alpen with sliced banana & 2 slices of polish sunflower toast & peanut butter, plus a coffee.

I didn't bother with Episodes (It's the last episode today, wonder if it gets a 2nd series? I don't think it was funny enough, myself!) I watched Glee with, Gwyneth (yawn) Paltrow, quite good, she sings well if that is actually her singing voice & not dubbed. Then it was Chatty Man Alan Carr, with some of 'The Only Way Is Essex' contributors (All of whom are on StarNow, like me, wonder if they were contacted on there for the show??) 

Read both The Sun & The Daily Mirror (which I bought purely for the Sherrie Hewson Exclusive) very disappointed, she said a Corrie co star attacked her, when she worked on Corrie, but the article doesn't name names (boring lets hope it's better tomorrow!!) Crashed at 5.30am  

I tried 3 diet pills today instead of 2 & I didn't keep running to the loo, like Kathryn's hubby did, when he tried doing that, although I did experience the kind of wind, in the evening, that I imagine someone on the cabbage soup diet, or someone eating nothing but sprouts would get! (Calories consumed 1,700)

Mum & Dad R.I.P

Tuesday 22nd Feb, Today is my late fathers birthday (he would of been 91 today, if he hadn't died of lung cancer 14years ago!) I had a very complex dream, can't recall details, except at one point online profiles came of up of some people, on a computer, don't know who, or why??  

I got up at 10am, and had 2 slices of Polish Sunflower Seed Bread, toasted with Peanut Butter & a Coffee for breakfast & soaked in the bath as my neck & shoulders are killing me today. Brushed hair & did a natural make-up & dressed the same as yesterday (but with clean underwear of course!) Went for a two hour walk round the local park. I thought after I should of done the 3hr there & back journey, to mum & dads grave, but I felt rough & there's no benches along the cemetery route if needed, unlike the park.

I got in & checked my emails, I have been contacted by Ch4 about doing a show, travelling round England, with Jack Whitehall & Denise Van Oulten, they wanted to know if I'm free, to do a shoot in Essex Thursday? 

Jack & Denise

I emailed back that I was & a guy called me & said someone from the production team would call me tomorrow. I also had a message from Aardvark Casting, saying 'The Casting Agreement was posted to you a few weeks ago, however we have not received it back yet'. That will be the bloody post again (I never got it!!) So over the past month they have lost, my contact lenses, my diary & my Casting agreement!!! WTF!!?? Hope the stuff I posted such as CV's were not lost by them!

The Real Housewives Of Orange County

I had a Weight Watchers Tomato & Herb Pasta Bake, for lunch with a Diet Coke & my 2nd diet pill of the day (unlike my friend Kathryn's husband, my bowels have not exploded yet, from taking 3 pills yesterday!!) I watched 'The Real Housewives Of Orange County' then set off for my acupuncture session & boy oh boy does my neck need it!! The session really throbbed again today, the acupuncturist said, it was going to be more severe at the moment, as my muscles are very tense! I have another session on March 8th (if not filming!) Watched 'Come Dine With Me' there is one annoying knob on there, called Zack I think I'd end up tipping my drink over his head!!

Watched 'Coach Trip' then tried to do some more housework, but my neck shoulders & arms were in so much pain, that I had to stop (I think I am going to have to get some heavy duty pain killers from the doctors) the pain is so bad I feel like crying. I read a bit of the paper, front page news is that, the Indian groom, Shrien Dewani who is accused of arranging his wife's car hijack murder in South Africa, on their honeymoon, has attempted suicide by taking an overdose of tablets, he had already dropped 2st prior to that. 
Some Fanatical Muslim scum, brutally attacked a RE teacher, just because they hated him teaching other religions, to Muslim girls (if the girls parents would of been bothered, they'd of sent them to a Muslim school) These 4 vile pieces of scum, Akmol Hussein 26, Sheikh Rashid 27, Azad Hussain 25 & Simon Alam attacked the teacher at 8.20am, as he walked to the school he worked at, in Bow East London, with the gang wearing black bandanna's. The teacher Gary Smith suffered a fractured skull & needed three operations, after being attacked with a iron bar, a concrete slab & a Stanley knife!! His mother called his attackers EVIL adding  his injury's were so bad I didn't recognise him! Gary 37 was cut from mouth to ear by the vile mob. This kind of scum, is what we need the death penalty for & fuck their human rights, as this kind of scum, isn't human!! 

 Tyrant Gaddafi

Evil, Madman, Libyan Tyrant, Colonel Gaddafi, who's arse The New Labour Party were half way up, has fled the capital Tripoli, after ordering jets & warships to bomb his own people, who were innocent freedom campaigners (executing any soldiers who refused!!) The twisted crackpot. Two horrified pilots flew their Mirage Jets to Malta, begging for political asylum, as they didn't want to do what he'd ordered, but knew the penalty if they didn't. At least 160 are known to be dead, Gaddafi is thought to be fleeing to Venezuela to get refuge from fellow tyrant Hugo Chavez. 

Shocking footage on YouTube & Facebook showed body's, allegedly burned alive by troops, the official death toll rose to 400, but an insider in Libya said, they are burying 300 people a day & has seen 800-1,000 dead most shot in head & chest, including children walking to school. Some results say that when men have protested at night, the army have gone to their homes & raped their women & then killed them. This is the man who's arse was kissed by New Labour, who for oil deals freed the Lockerbie Bomber & over looked the fact that one of his aids murdered, one of our police women WPC Yvonne Fletcher, New Labour should hang their heads in shame!!

Also under despicable New Labour, 3Million immigrants came here legally, at a rate of 1 a minute & another 1Million illegally, all done on purpose by New Labour, to change Britain forever (for the worse!!) A study showed that after Labour got into power in 1997 3/4 of all new jobs went to foreigners, which will come as no surprise to the unemployed British who want to work, like myself (lucky my dad died that year, far too delirious to know that, they had got into power, or he'd of died broken hearted!) Council house waiting lists soared (I've spent 30yrs on the waiting list & still no nearer the top!!) it also put pressure on the UKs schools, railways, roads & of course hospitals. During this period 1Million disillusioned home grown Brits emigrated. Immigration Minister Damian Green said the report " exposes how Labour utterly failed on immigration"  (Tell us something we didn't already know & feel!!) 

According to a poll the average Brit spends £168,000 on 120 holidays in there life time (that means I have 109 holidays to fit in before I pop my clogs..... Yes I have been abroad more than 11 times, in my 46yrs on the planet, but most was for work & only 11 have been for holidays, since I was a kid) 

With  Freckle, My Turkish Cat, She Finds Me Whenever I'm On Holiday, In Cesme Turkey (She's My Adopted Stray)

A murder hunt is on, for a piece of vile scum, that kicked to death a 86yr old widow, in her home, it is suspected to be the work of a drug crazed burglar, in Downton South London. She was found with her dog whimpering beside her. A shocked neighbour said "you couldn't of met a nicer person" about victim Jean Jobson. Vile piece of scum, I hope the bastard that did it gets caught & lynched in jail!!

The mum of 40st teen Georgina Davis, Lesley Miles, says she feels, she is to blame for her daughters weight! & so she should take at least 3/4 of the blame! Georgina was 33st at 15yrs but after going to a USA Fat Camp, she  came home at 16yrs weighing 18st. When she got home her 1st meal (made/bought by her mum) was Fish & Chips, because (her mum told her) she didn't have time to make her something healthy. So what chance did this overeating teen have, with a mother with that useless attitude? I could make myself a omelet with a mixed leaf salad (from a bag sold in all supermarkets) with sliced tomato & a scoop of plain low fat cottage cheese, in under 2mins, so why couldn't her mum? Because she couldn't be bothered that's why!

 Georgina With Her Mum, At 15yrs & 33st
 Georgina Just Back From Fat Camp, At 16yrs & 18st
Georgina Back At Mums, At 17yrs & 40st!!

She must of known, when her daughter was returning from the USA & had plenty of time, to put healthy food items in the fridge, freezer & cupboards. No Time, is NO Excuse!! She could of made up a batch of healthy vegetable soup, in advance & frozen it in freezer bags, or tubs, which could easily be reheated in the microwave. 

Georgina doesn't eat as obscenely huge portions, as Britain's fattest man (mentioned in other blogs) But her sedate 'carer' lifestyle with her mum, adds to the problem. No exercise soon lets the pounds pile on (As I know myself, as I have gained 2st since my mum died on May 11th 2009, due to grief making me have little to no energy, to go to the gym which I use to do 2-4hrs a day 5-7 days a week) 

Being a carer for her mum kept her housebound & although her mum moans that the NHS didn't get her daughter a gym membership, the newly slimmed 18st Georgina, fresh back from America, could of gone for a 2-3hr walk every day, and/or walked up & down her home stairs 50 times a day & if she didn't want to, her mum should of made her, then Georgina would of stayed at 18st or maybe even lost more & would not of ballooned to 40st which is 7st heavier than she weighed before she went to the American Fat Camp!!

I can't believe that Claire from CAN Associates (who until recently, I thought, was a great, astute business woman) has allowed Kerry Katona's latest interview in The Sun's TV Biz (she will of proof read everything before it was allowed to go to print) The small front page's insert caption was, Kerry 'I Need Sex' and inside her article headline was 'I'm So hot that fellas chase me in the streets' Oh dear you build bridges & then burn them down. 

The public who was beginning to warm to Kerry again, after she seemed to be genuinely trying her best (with Claire's help) to turn her life around (like I was) Will be totally turned off, by what comes off, in this article, as arrogant vanity, and quite frankly the normal amongst us is not remotely interested in her libido or love life!! She said a fella chased her down the street for her phone number adding "Did I heck give it to him. I was in a bed shop as well" Errrrr? A bed shop in the street? I don't think so! Was it in a Shop or in the street? A  faux story or editing fail, which was saying it in the street & in a bed shop? (or neither as it's made up & that's why its not consistent!) 

I reckon its the latter, that along with her "I'm ready to date & I'd do speed dating for a laugh" comment has been used purely, to deter from her recent renewed dalliance, with her boot camp trainer (who's now getting divorced & the ex wife to be blaming Kerry) As they mention her two ex husbands & her ex builder boyfriend Adam, but NOT her fitness trainer dalliance!! I'll give her credit her body looks fab, in the scantily clad pic with the article, but she has the face of a woman 10yrs older than her 30yrs & that's probably airbrushed! 

I watched Lion Country on ITV a brilliant show, then Gok Wan on Ch4 +1 so so, Not surprised the designer beat the High St, on the Runway. I had a bowl of Alpen & some Peanut butter on toast for dinner, with the 3rd & final Slimming Pill for tea (that's the last of my trial bottles tablets, they are now all gone) as I was peckish Not hungry, enough for a large dinner. 

I have a bloated, distended, tummy, and wind again, this evening, but still no rushing to the loo, after the 3 slimming tablets, taken 2 days in a row. It was then a night of watching CSI, before having an early night at 1.30am, after applying the lotion to thicken my eyebrows & lengthen my lashes (as I have every night since Feb 3rd) settling down to sleep, with the wind howling outside & in!! (Calories consumed 1,406)

Wednesday 23rd Feb, I had a very odd dream, I was at a big celebrity event with my BFF Candie, We were all done up, at some point we had to leave, but I could not find my coat & bag, Candie & others were waiting in a car outside, but I couldn't leave until I found it, as not only did my bag have my purse with my money and bank cards in but it also contained my keys, so I couldn't get back in my home & it had my friend David's house keys on there too!! I never seemed too & my dream seemed to jump elsewhere & at some point, I was at home, watching TV, switching channels, and my late father was there & something about throwing away a large Casserole Pot, because somebody or something had defecated in it! WTF????  

I had a bowl of sugar free Alpen for breakfast & a coffee, then I had a wash & tied back hair & did a natural make-up, it's another cold, grey, miserable rainy day outside, so I wore my khaki Elle leggings, under my long khaki military style tunic, with jewel & chain embellished black epaulettes, plus my long black, flat boots. Then wrapped up in my long black coat & my black magic scarf & matching gloves, then headed out into the miserable rainy day for another 2hr walk round the park. 

My stomach is still very bloated & I still have some residue wind left over, from the past two (3 diet pills a day) days, yet still no rush to the loo doing that!! Despite it having that effect, on other testers!! Hmmmmm curious! Popped in the shop on the way home from the Park & got a Sun paper, I didn't bother with the Mirror today, Sherrie Hewson's Exclusive just isn't juicy or explosive enough to waste another 45p on.

Ch4's production team, contacted me about the Essex program, they'd talked to me about yesterday. The filming date has been changed, from tomorrow to Tuesday March 1st. I had vegetable casserole for lunch & watched 'Loose Women' & 'The Real Housewives Of Orange County', Then popped out to pay January's Rent (Still trying to catch up with that!) 

The woman I paid, asked if my tap problems were fixed? I said yes, BUT 6 months later, my stripped windowsill has still not been painted black, leaving the bare wood exposed to the elements, of rain & snow for 6+ months (which can't be good for it!!) and the keyhole surround has still not been put back on, which looks bloody awful & makes key wobble around, when using keyhole. 

Then I set off & got some cleansing wipes, Ibuprofen & some Corn & Blister Plasters from Wilkinson's, with some of my shop vouchers. I headed home, getting a Caramel Cappuccino, from Costa Coffee, on the way home, with my points slowly accumulated on my loyalty card YUMMY!!!  Bought a bowl of Bananas, a bowl of Avocado's & a bowl of Cherry Tomatoes for £2 off the market, also on the way home. 

I got in did a bulk load of job searches, and applied for over 20 (lost count after the 20th!!) and applied for a couple of auditions, then I had a Ocean Crumble with salad for lunch, before reading the paper, more sad news. 10 Brits dead in a Kiwi earthquake, 75 people have been confirmed as dead so far, 300 people are still missing (how tragic!) Pictures in the paper of Jennifer Aniston & Gary Linikers wife Danielle, both with new bob haircuts, both looked bloody awful, their old haircut, before the change, was much better. 

Ha ha ha a scientific study has shown Organic food, is no healthier or tastier, than non-organic variety's, and in some cases inferior, only naturally grown tomato's had a stronger smell & sweeter taste. That's two fingers up at the food snobs, that look down on those who can't afford organic vegetables obscene prices in stores.

Birmingham's masked hero vigilante "The Statesman" who has help arrest a drug dealer, & foiled a break-in, among other good deeds, kept it a secret from him mum. She only knew of 26yr Scott Cooke's job as a Bank Clerk for Santander, and had no idea of his crime fighting double life! Meanwhile madman Gaddafi is still threatening revenge on Libya's protesters from his bombed home. 

Pictures of Samantha Cameron are in the paper, looking less than impressed at London fashion week, at the show of designer Erdem, and who can blame her? The model looks repulsively skeletal, like a famine victim, or a Holocaust Nazi Camp victim, vile, couture always use to be about aspiration, who the hell would want to look like dead woman walking? What happened to the days when models were beautiful & aspirational? like Karen Mulder or Linda Evangelista who were beautiful, where this bag of bones is ugly. 

 Supermodel? No, Dead Woman Walking

Some Evil Bastard shot 8 swans in a field, in Somerset, with an airgun. One shot 3 times, one that survived the attack is being cared for at an animal centre. What kind of twisted scum does this? Probably the type that goes on to murder people. I hope the scum is found & the book thrown at the vile shit, as Swans are owned by the Queen & are protected!! Breaks my heart, seeing the swans in my local park make my day, such beautiful, graceful creatures! 

I did some tidying up while munching on some Mini Cheddars & had a diet coke to keep me going, then at 8pm I watched 'Beauty & The Beast' on Ch4, this week it was Jessica Whitfield, born with a haematoma, benign tumour on her face, which disfigured her, and a 22yr glamour model, Chloe Page, who obviously suffers from body dimorphia, as she is about a size 4 & skinny as a rake (except for fake boobs) & wanted lypo suction, on the thighs, of her stick like legs. 

 Jessica  & Chloe
Chloe & The Thunder Thighs She Wanted Lypo'd

Ironically, she seemed oblivious to the one thing, that did need a bit of work, her huge Somalian looking forehead (not unlike Lauren Pope) So all she really needed, to improve her looks, was a trip to the hairdressers, for a fringe. Not all the stupid surgery she was after!! If she sucked anything out of those skinny legs, with that big forehead & those big eyes, all she'd need was a lick of yellow paint & she'd of looked the spitting image of Tweety Pie!!

Then I watched 'NCIS' I LOVE that show! Followed by Ch4's new docu show 'The Model Agency' a fly on the wall series on Top Model Agency, Premier Models. The employee's were unpalatable, harsh, superficial, false and sycophantical, with $$££ in their eyes & no REAL compassion, or scruples, & from the tirades coming up, on my Twitter wall, I think it is safe to say that the show will not do Premier Models any favours, it was also interesting to see how many, very unattractive people, were in charge of deciding if the aspiring models were attractive enough for their books. Including Carole White herself! I wonder if you get to be, one of the few who gets on Premiers books, whether your known as a 'Premier In'? 

Its funny how the misogynist modelling agency's, wants their female models, to be emaciated (for the clothes to hang better!!... *Bullshit they hung better on Linda Evangilista, Christy Turlington, Cindy Crawford etc who were NOT a walking carcass) Yet the male models, do not need to be borderline skeletons, for their clothes to hang better!!) I feel this program will have a negative, not a positive impact on the Industry, which I use to work in as both a designer & a model (not for major designers though) in the past. 

What Supermodels Use To Look Like 
& What They Should STILL Look Like!!

I got the munchies & had some Alpen, with fresh blueberries, then I chilled the rest of the night, reading my Marilyn Monroe book, until 4am, but I had trouble sleeping (Calories consumed 1,426)

Thursday 24th Feb, I didn't fall asleep until after 6.30am, dreamt but can't recall any details, other it was to do with online data again, I was woken at 10.30am by hammering on my door, wondered if it was the postman? But no it was the guy in charge of the decorating work, for my landlords. Saying "I hear you have been complaining about me again!!" (No I complained about your useless workman!!) I replied "No, I was asked  if all work, on my flat had been done, and I said the windowsill and keyhole surround, still hadn't!!" 

He replied that Joe was putting the sealant on my windowsill now (what do you want a round of applause? that along with a coat of paint should of been done over 6 months ago, when he started painting it!!!) He said the workman had left the keyhole surround on the ground, when he painted the door! I was well aware that, the lazy bastard had done that, instead of putting it & my door numbers back on, when it was dry/semi dry. 

I said "I know & it was a windy day & all the screws had blown away, and you took the numbers & surround off me, to give to him to put back on!" He said that he hadn't had them (he had, but it's no surprise he doesn't recall it) as it was 5-6months ago, when he came round to apologise, for his same useless workman, who had painted my back window open, unbeknown to me, until I went in there, and found the property I'd got from my mums, after she'd died, and stored in there, soaking wet from the torrential rain (that had lashed in through the window, over two days!) He'd made the excuse at the time, that the screws were too rusty to re put the numbers, and keyhole surround back on (bollocks if they'd of not blown away, I'd of put them back on myself!!)  

He said I'd said, that my key wobbles in the lock, when I use it without surround (which it does) He said that was rubbish & the surround was just aesthetic!! It isn't rubbish, but that's neither here nor there! I said "Yes it is aesthetic & it looks bloody awful with it missing!! It had one before it was painted & I want (expect) one after its painted too!!" He said he'd get a surround put on adding "Now don't make any more complaints about me! my wife works there, she told me what you said!!" Is that a veiled threat? ....Fuck Right Off!!!!... Make sure your employee's do a proper job, then I will have no reason to moan/complain, will I, Tosser!!! 

Lets see how long it takes to get the key surround!? And also how long it takes before the sill is painted black? (as it took no time at all to do the sealant it appears!!) if its still not done by summer (when it will be a year since the work started) I WILL definitely be fucking complaining again!.. No mention of the beading, that's needing doing on my window either I notice (Incompetence & shoddy workmanship really is my bug bear!!)

Made Alpen with sliced banana for breakfast (yum!) which I had with a coffee.  Watched 'This Morning' 'Loose Women' & 'The News' while doing online job searches & applying for jobs & auditions. Then it was time to make lunch, I had Quorn Cutlets (cooked this morning then left to go cold) & chopped them up with salad, with the avocado & tomatoes bought yesterday, with a low fat French style dressing on salad & cutlets. Then I caught up with what's going on in the world, in the paper. 

The front cover of The Sun, says Gaddafi ordered Lockerbie bombing (Is that really a surprise to anyone) including New Labour who's tongues were so far up his arse they could of licked his larynx!! More on the two repulsive Muslims, who torched a wreath of Poppy's on Armistice day, during the 2 minute silence, shouting obscenity's about our soldiers & country. If you don't like it here then FUCK OFF HOME SCUM!!!

Murdering Paedophile Colin Hatch 38, was strangled to death, just like his little boy victim, Sean Williams was, by fellow inmate Damien Fowkes 35, Fowkes is also alleged to be the prisoner, said to have slashed paedophile Ian Huntley, in an attempt to kill him (shame he failed that time!!) At this rate Fowkes will have cleared up all the scum in jail & sorted out the lack of room in jails, freeing them up for more, scum criminals. 

Proof that the misogynist fashion industry, is trying to starve female models until they look like thin men, comes today via pictures from London Fashion Week, where one of the glam models showing off the frocks, was in fact a willowy male model, called Andrej Pejic, the most worrying thing is, that he actually had more curves, than the boney women on the catwalk these days!! ...

Male Model Andrej Pejic

That was followed by a picture of Gwyneth Paltrow looking unattractively scrawny in her bikini, while on her holiday in Barbados. If that's what a macrobiotic diet does for you, I'll pass thanks! I'd rather be a chubber!!

Jennie text to invite me over for a drink, but I wasn't that keen to go, anyway we have nothing of interest to talk to each other about anymore. Our lives are totally different now, but didn't have the heart to say no! I was just moving some things around in the hall to move into back room, when I twisted my back (on top of my bad neck & shoulders) bloody hurt, but fate gave me an excuse to cancel going to Jennies. But to be honest I'd of fancied some less painful fate. Ian Called he can't do the Essex show, so will get Bob to do it with me if I'm selected!! Watched 'Home & Away' (excellent as always!!) Took a load of pain killers (which numbed, but didn't kill my pain) Then had a Ocean Crumble, with steamed vegetables. 

TV was pretty rubbish until 10pm, when the brilliant Celebrity Juice was on (So funny) The Twilight Vampire challenge with Jedwood was very very funny!!... But the game that involved a naked old man pensioner, with his penis flapping all over the place, was hysterical!.... at the end Keith Lemon (Leigh Frances) slapped the old boys tadger!!..... he later tweeted, he wont be touching an old man's penis again as his hand smells of biscuits (Hob Nobs per chance??) I tried to sleep but was in too much pain, so in the end I stayed up until 3.30am catching up on writing last weeks blog. (Calories consumed 1,465)

Friday 25th Feb, I had a weird dream where I was working as an escort or something, and was with this fat Oriental guy, who I assume was a client & he was going to stay the night with me & I thought "What the hell am I doing, this isn't me!! I don't want to be here doing this, then my dream skipped somewhere else & I was with Candie's two sons Tiger & Xavier, in a Department Store, looking for a doc in a crèche area for some reason?

I had a bath & a hair wash & exfoliated myself. Rubbed in a load of moisturiser & pottered round in my fluffy pink, towelling, hooded bathrobe. Then made a bowl of Alpen with some added blueberries for breakfast, washed down with a diet coke. I went to get a Sun paper, but they were sold out in my local shop & so I walked to the next newsagents to get one, but they are closed!! 

Popped back to local shop to get milk & the guy said he'd get me a Sun when he goes into town on his break & to pop in in the evening. Changed the bed linen & put a white wash in the machine. Then watched 'Loose Women'  & the news. It's my nephews 1st Birthday today & I went to text my brother & his wife to see how his big day was going?? But I couldn't as I didn't have enough credit to & only £2 in my purse so couldn't top it up!

Chanel 4 called, they definitely want me on Tuesday & told me of all the fun events we'd be doing, then came the hit, it was meant to be all expenses paid, but now we just get £10 towards expenses, which is a cop out, as normally my fare would be £15 but as I have to be in Bow in the East End for 9.30am, so I will have to get a train before 9am, which means my fare will be around £28 where as some, who are coming from London, will be quids in!! So it went from being all expenses paid, to it costing me £18!! 

Well all I can say is it better be a good day out, to cost me ££ I can't afford!! If my money wasn't going into my account Friday night, I wouldn't have the money to go Tuesday! I'm only going as it will increase my performance numbers, to get me my Equity card & then I can go for the well paid jobs. A while later Bob called me, saying it sounded like a good day out & thanking me for inviting him. 

I had a coffee & a bar of Bornville, as I'd been craving chocolate, which is odd for me (I think my Chocoholic late mum must be possessing me, as since she died I have been eating chocolate, when I never bothered before!) Also tries some Reese's Pieces, as I love Peanut Butter, but boy oh boy are they sickly sweet or what, felt quite queasy after!! Felt like I was going to go into a Sugar Comma!!

Spent the evening finishing off last weeks blog, while watching 'The Mentalist' & the NEW 'Benidorm' not very funny, Then the Brilliant 'Fast & Loose' got the munchies as I'd not had dinner so had some Alpen. Then Watched 'The Graham Norton Show' not as good as usual Actress Diane Kruger, was pretty boring, I don't think I have seen her in anything?? 

Matthew Fox from 'Lost' looked bloody awful, with his goatee beard!! And he didn't offer up much personality wise either!! Thank god for John Bishop to liven up the couch!! I continued with last weeks blog & it was all written by 4am, but then came the longest bit, reading it through & sorting Grammar & spellings then adding the pictures & links etc (Calories consumed 1,426)

Saturday 26th Feb, I was still  awake at 8am, posted last weeks blog & then popped to the local Off Licence/Newsagents for a Sun Paper. I then settled down to sleep around 8.30am, despite the noise from the hairdressers below. I had a bitty restless sleep, with bitty restless dreams which I can no longer recall! Got up at 12.30pm & had Alpen & a banana for brunch with a coffee. Dressed in white 3/4 leggings & a oversize, patterned, yellow, orange, lime & white striped, jumper, that mum made me. Hoovered the lounge & watered the plants & put in a green wash, then did the washing up. 

I thought I must put, Mikes Ebay Items on Ebay today or tomorrow while its free insertion fees this weekend, I also need to re list my items that didn't sell a month or so ago! I had a late lunch of a Tuna sandwich & a packet of Branston Pickle Mini Cheddars, with a diet coke. Watched The American Idol Auditions. Then 'Dance For Comic Relief' which either Jarred Christmas (as Madonna) or Andi Osho (as Michael Jackson) should of won, Not Noel Fielding (as Kate Bush) who reminded me more of Florence & The Machine!

Then 'Watched Take Me Out' no date for Heidi no hunks this week either, there was some boring fuddy duddy, caught in a time warp from Hertfordshire, I said to my friend Fellow actress Maxine Webb "People ask me why I am still single living in Hertfordshire, it's full of men like him is the answer!" Everyone on Twitter was talking about that Arsehole of a footballer Ashley Cole, shooting a staff member with a air riffle..... Moron!!

Had a couple of Quorn Burgers, with Weight Watchers mash & a Twirl bar for dessert, neck and shoulders in a load of pain, and no amount of pain killers seemed to help. Watched the Raunchy Tudors with a can of K Cider, to try knock myself out for a good nights sleep to escape the pain a bit. Then I worked on this blog, had a bowl of Alpen when I got hungry at 3am. I then continued writing until 5am then tried to sleep & when by 7am, I still couldn't due to the pain being to severe in neck & shoulders. I popped to the shop for a NOTW, the front page story was about, idiot Ashley Cole shooting a member of staff. I got a text message from Orange saying I'd got a £2 top up bonus from them, which is bloody handy (Calories Consumed 1,785)

Sunday 27th Feb, I was still awake at 8am yet again!!  So I listed my items on Ebay (which took ages, as all the items that hadn't sold before, had gone out of my unsold folder...... bollocks!!!) So I had to re list each & then add Mikes & had to send lots of texts to Mike to get something more than scant info about the sink and high chair, using up most of my mobile phone credit eventually did it all at 10.30-11am & text him saying it was done & asked if I could borrow his old Digital camera (he was bought a new one in October for his birthday by his partner) as I still can't afford to get mine fixed/buy new one crashed out until 1pm. 

Got up at 1pm & got on the scales, bloody hell, another lb gained (so since I started on the diet pills I have gained 3 1/4lb NOT GOOD!!) gutted my friend Kathryn lost 7lb while eating cake etc & her hubby 10lb, but after getting in touch with the maker, I was told they would be no good for me, as I had my gallbladder removed in Nov 2008 & so my digestive system works different, than others who have a gallbladder, but they are bringing out a new pill, which again I will be trialling & will let you know of my progress, good or bad!!

I had a washed & did hair & make-up then slipped into some lingerie & a half open negligee to film my video audition on my webcam, for the Ad online audition, The Ad (for a shaver) is to be filmed in lingerie, while making a confession to a guy, who shaves my legs, as I speak, I am in the final selection for one of the 8 main actresses in the Ad. I was given 3 scenarios to film, see below

Feel free to embellish your own detail onto the character, and remember to convey the slightly awkward, sexy tension between you and the close male friend you are ‘confessing’ to. Good luck!

Scenario 1

Last week you were the bridesmaid at your best friend’s wedding. You have always had a flirty relationship with her then-fiancé, and have had a naughty dream about him more than once. The reception was held in a grand old mansion, and you got tipsy and wandered into a bedroom to find your best friend’s now-husband sipping champagne on his own. You closed the door, and he invited you to join him for a drink, which you did. Next thing, you were kissing on the bed, and then you made love. It was amazing. Now, you can’t stop thinking about him, and he has texted you asking to meet again, Should you meet him?

Scenario 2
You have a gay brother, who has a model boyfriend. He’s so exquisite looking that everyone talks about how beautiful he is. Last weekend, your brother and his boyfriend came down to stay for the night.You all went out to a gay club, and had a great time, but your brother drank too much, whilst you got tipsy. When you came back to your house, your brother immediately went to sleep upstairs, leaving you downstairs with his boyfriend.You can’t quite remember how, but you went from talking about his modelling career to sitting next to him, to staring into his amazing eyes, to kissing, and then to making love on the floor. Afterwards, it was really awkward and he got up immediately and ran off to join your brother in bed. In the morning things were really tense, and you suspect your brother suspects something is up. Should you tell your brother? 

Scenario 3
You have recently started a new job in a top lawyer firm.You were given a big job to do in your first couple of weeks, and you had left it to the last minute. It got to the Friday before it had to be handed in, and so everyone had left for the weekend already, apart from you. It got to 9pm when the office door opened, and the CEO walked in having forgotten something. He saw you and came over to check you were OK. You got tearful and confessed to him that you had left it to the last minute, and were worried about being sacked. He hugged you and told you it was all going to be OK, but he didn’t let go. Before you knew it, you were kissing him passionately, before you made love to him over the desk.You now see him in the stationary cupboard every day for a brief encounter, and he has talked about leaving his wife and kids. Should you continue the affair?

Once that was done I had some Alpen for breakfast & two Krisprolls with peanut butter & a coffee & got dressed, hoovered the back room & put a red wash in the machine, & took the dry laundry off the radiators to iron tomorrow. Then I went to Email the audition & discovered they hadn't put the email address, but tracked down the bluebeards-revenge site & the email of the guy who contacted me. 

Went to send off the video & bollocks hotmail said the file was to big to send (how come it's only a 2-4min clip??) fuck tried several times it even asked if I wanted to download it as an Internet file with a link & when I clicked yes it was still too big!! Fuck so I got back into my lingerie & made 8 more, trying to make each one of them shorter without looking rushed, also there was no longer any natural light like before, so the picture was grainy & looked tangoed !! 

But still no joy, all still too big! Bloody webcam why does it allow you to make files that are too big to use/send?? Not being tech savvy & being totally self taught when it comes to PS's/Laptops I looked at the settings, it looked like I could make it one setting smaller, so I tried that & made two more hoping they would be small enough, but the 2nd felt very hurried! 

Still no joy!!!! SCREEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!!! but the most hurried & worst of the lot, was small enough, to load on Vimeo, so I have posted it HERE for you lot to laugh at (as it is the worst of the lot & is bloody awful!!) Meanwhile I am wracking my brains as to how to shrink them to be small enough to send, by the deadline of 9.30am Monday (tomorrow) So I emailed my DJ friend Richard, who helped me upgrade my PC who works in Computers, he said I could still send large files by MSN & I could send to him & he could download in a smaller format for me & email back to me, to email on!... PHEW!!

That sounded great, so I went onto MSN & sent the file to Richard on MSN, Richard said "FUCK that's HUGE!.... you could put a 3hr film in a file that size!!" I was shocked saying "Really? so why would my stupid webcam store my small recording in such a big file?" He said he didn't know, I said "I went into settings & there seemed to only be two size settings & both seem too big!!?" He said I might as well cancel my download as it would take forever, he said he was doing the airport run at 4am, how late was I staying up? "As long as I need to" I said. He replied he could pick me up after as I'd need to take laptop to his to connect to his PC & download it onto his PC, into a smaller file & hopefully get it done & sent off by 9.30am. One thing is for sure like 'Blue Beard' it will be a very Close shave!!!

Had a late lunch/tea of 3 veggie sausages & Weight Watchers mash, washed down with a coffee, chatted briefly on twitter & then watched Dancing On Ice while I did my Critique Blog, which you can read if you click HERE!!! I was not happy with who the public put in the bottom two at all tonight!! Then Watched 'That Sunday Night Show' followed by 'Outcasts' it's episode 6 so I need to get up to speed on this NEW Sci Fi show 

Popped to the shop & got a Redbull & some Diet Cokes (Not Decaf!!) to ensure I stayed awake into the wee hrs then finished off this blog now at 3.30am So you will have to wait until next week to see if the audition video gets sent in time? & if so will I prove to be a 'cut above the rest?', in the 'Nick' of time, to get the 'Shaving' Ad and 'Razor' laugh or two!! Also to see how my filming with Channel 4 went on Tuesday. (Calories consumed 1,472)

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